Tuesdays with Morrie

I read this book in one go! It's a wonderful read. You will agree with me if you have already read it..if not, here are few quotes by Morrie, a terminally ill professor on various facets of life:

Have you found someone to share your heart with?
Are you giving to your community?
Are you at peace with yourself?
Are you trying to be as human as you can be?


Well, for one thing, the culture we have does not make people feel good about themselves. We're teaching the wrong things. And you have to be strong enough to say if the culture doesn't work, don't buy it. Create your own. Most people can't do it.


So many people walk around with meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they are chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself in loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.


You closed your eyes. That was the difference. Sometimes you cannot believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. And if you are ever going to have other people trust you, you must feel that you can trust them, too- even when you're in the dark. Even when you're falling.


Do you take care of others or take care of your "inner child"? Return to traditional values or reject tradition as useless? Seek success or seek simplicity? Just say No or Just do it?


Love each other or perish. And its so true. Without love, we are birds with broken wings.


There is no experience like having children. That's all. There is no substitute for it. You cannot do it with a friend. You cannot do it with a lover. if you want to experience of having complete responsibility for another human being and learn how to love and bond in the deepest way, then you should have children.


I thought about how often this was needed in everyday life. How we feel lonely, sometimes to the point of tears, but we don't let those tears come because we are not supposed to cry. Or how we feel a surge of love for a partner but we don't say anything because we're frozen with a fear of what those words might do to the relationship.


I don't want to leave the world in a state of fright. I want to know what's happening, accept it, get to a peaceful place, and let go.


On Morrie working with mental patients:
Morrie observed that most of the patients there had been rejected and ignored in their lives, made to feel that they didn't exist. They also missed compassion-something that staff ran out quickly. And many of these patients were well-off, from rich families, so their wealth did not buy them happiness or contentment. It was a lesson he never forgot.


All this emphasis on youth- I don't buy it, he said. Listen, I know what a misery being young can be, so don't tell me its so great. All these kids who came to me with their struggles, their strife, their feelings of inadequacy, their sense that life was miserable, so bad they wanted to kill themselves...


Its all part of the same problem, Mitch, Morrie said, we put our values in the wrongs things. And it leads to very disillusioned lives.


We have got a form of brainwashing going on it our country. Morrie sighed. Do you know how they brainwash people? They repeat something over and over. And that's what we do in this country. Owning things is good. More money is good. More property is good. More commercialism is good. More is good.


Money is not a substitute for tenderness, and power is not substitute for tenderness.


There's a big confusion in this country over what we want versus what we need. You need food, you want a chocolate sundae. You have to be honest with yourself.


Do the kind of things that come from the heart. When you do, you won't be dissatisfied, you won't be envious, you won't be longing for somebody else's things.


We are great at small talk: What do you do? Where do you live? But really listening to someone- without trying to sell them something, pick them, recruit them, or get some kind of status in return- how often do we get this anymore?


I've learned this much about marriage, you get tested. You find out who you are, who the other person is and how you accommodate or don't.


There are few rules I know to be true about love and marriage: If you don't respect the other person, you are gonna have a lot of trouble. If you don't know how to compromise, you're gonna have lot of trouble. And if you can't talk openly about what goes on between you, you're gonna have a lot of trouble. And if you don't have common set of values in life, you're gonna have a lot of trouble.


Biggest one of those values: Your belief in the importance of your marriage.


I think marriage is a very important thing to do, and you're missing a hell of a lot if you don't try it.


Love each other or perish.


You can't get stuck on the regrets of what should have happened.


Death is as natural as life. It's part of the deal we made.


Death ends a life, not a relationship.