This is a verbatim representation of the mail I got from my colleague and its' really hilarious and found it worth sharing. Its' an interesting portrayal of guy's thinking. Especially number 6, 9, 13 and 19, I found very funny.
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss's car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
5: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
6: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.
7: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
8: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
9: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.
10: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.
11: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
12: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.
13: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.
14: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.
15: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
16: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.
17: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
18: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.
19: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.
20: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.
21: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want forChristmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.
22: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.
2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss's car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.
4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.
5: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.
6: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.
7: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.
8: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.
9: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.
10: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.
11: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.
12: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.
13: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.
14: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.
15: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.
16: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.
17: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.
18: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.
19: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.
20: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.
21: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want forChristmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.
22: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.
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